Monday, April 30, 2007


Random thoughts while painting the bathroom

As I'm painting our main-floor two-piece bathroom, I'm blogging the entire thing in my head. I have no idea why I think anyone in the blogosphere needs a scintillating stroke-by-stroke account of me painting the bathroom, but here you go.

  • I like painting. It requires a meticulous mindlessness that is peculiarly calming. Just the right parts of my brain are being engaged in making sure I don't get excessive paint on the baseboards and ceiling.
  • I like the detailed bits, taping around all the edges and the fixtures, cutting the edges with long strokes, and how just when you think you will never be done - because in a 5 x 5 bathroom with two fixtures it takes five times as long to cut as to roll - you haul out the roller and you go from not even close to done in about seven minutes.
  • We have lived in this house for almost four years, and are just now getting around to painting over the pepto-bismal pink and cream colour of the main-floor bathroom. We tore down the pink and blue flowered wallpaper border more than a year ago. We are, on the whole, fairly lazy about home improvement tasks around here.
  • When we moved in, the whole house was dominated by a pink-and-blue colour scheme, with several variations on a floral wallpaper border. I'm so not a pink-and-blue-with-flowers sort of girl.
  • Five foot eight inches seems to be about the perfect height to be able to reach the ceiling cut line with a handheld roller, without having to stand on tiptoe. Conveniently, I am exactly 5'8".
  • The people at Home Depot need to take a page from the people at Ikea and provide some sort of diversion for kids if they want to maximize parental spending. Mischevious three year olds do not have much patience for the selection and preparation of paint and primer.
  • It is nearly impossible to paint a 5 x 5 bathroom without getting paint on your ass.
  • Whomever said you shouldn't fret over choosing a paint colour because you can always just buy another colour and do it over again obviously never painted with a three and five year old in the house.
  • The average preschooler can ask approximately 3,923 questions about paint, colours, masking tape, rollers, brushes, sponges and rocketships in the time it takes to paint a bathroom.
  • There is no easy way to paint behind a toilet, and it is simply impossible to paint behind a toilet without getting paint in your hair. It's been many years since I spent so much time in such intimate contact with my toilet.
  • If the paint drips into your coffee, it makes your coffee taste very, very bad.
  • Long after both boys are potty trained and we leave the world of diapers behind, I will continue to buy baby wipes. I used them to dust the top of the door frame, wipe paint drips off faucet, get smeared paint off the towel bar and wipe the black ink off my feet from standing on newsprint.
  • Writing a post about painting the bathroom takes up exactly the right amount of time to let the first rolled coat sit before you roll on the second coat.
  • Blogging about painting a bathroom seems like a much better idea when you are painting the bathroom and thinking about blogging than when you are blogging and thinking about painting the bathroom.